Shanghai

Shanghai （上海）which means above the sea, would have been more apt I thought if it was called Renhai (人海）which means sea of people.
Shanghai which holds JUST 20 million people... felt like the whole world is here. I mean Shanghai is not only populated by Shanghainese but people from all over China, and all over the world. That is a do-not-have to be proven fact.
However, I am still feeling confused as to what draws people to this place. To what draws me to this place. And the reason why am I thinking thrice (as opposed to twice) as to why I am leaving this place. I thought I would stay here for a longer time.
I do hate so many things about this place though. And the list would go on and on.
I hate the overcrowded bus and subway. I hate fighting over taxis and taxi drivers who smoke and speak on the handphone while driving. I hate smokers and smokers in China especially as they have no etiquette so whatsoever as to where and how they should smoke. There is an etiquette and ethic to it believe me. I hate the winter, which at its coldest felt like ice piercing your ear and nose.
So that still does not leave me with any support as to why I will miss leaving this place. Strange isn't?
However.
I know.
Besides the fact that I love multicultural city, and also a city which gives me freedom to walk freely on the street (as compared to Jakarta), and to do whatever I want. What I am going to miss the most is....
It's the friendship I have made here, the people that I am going to leave behind that is making me think... if I made the right decision. To leave.

A place after all is not only about its buildings... but alleys and corners.
An experience is not all about beautiful memories, and laughter... but sad memories and tears.

That what made me today.

Wasted space

space
this is what it is.

what i wished for this space
that it rains
and then
i
really wished that i am brave enough to run out the door when it rains

forget about the umbrella
forget about the drench
forget about the soaked clothes after
forget about the clamines
forget about everything

just the rain and me
washing away everything

so the moment could be all mine
at that moment space and time is all mine
stop in that time and space
to be free
to have space

space
this is what it is.